I'll Be There to Catch You When You Fall
by neurolingual
Summary: 'It was only one time', Hanna told herself, leaning back against the wall as she flushed the toilet, rubbing her now-itchy eyes with her clean hand. 'It was only this time. I'm never doing it again.'
1. chapter 1

'_It was only one time_', Hanna told herself, leaning back against the wall as she flushed the toilet, rubbing her now-itchy eyes with her clean hand. '_It was only this time. I'm never doing it again_.'

She takes a deep breath and pushes herself up off the ground, walking over to the sink to wash her hands. She hoped she hadn't been loud; Alison was hosting a Christmas party at her house, half of Rosewood was in attendance. If someone had heard what she was doing, they'd tell her mother, for sure. _That _was not a conversation Hanna was looking forward to.

She hadn't planned on doing this, but all it too was one arched blonde eyebrow and a disapproving frown and Hanna was in Alison's bathroom, emptying her stomach into the porcelain bowl.

The mirror offered now comfort for Hanna's already diminishing self-confidence. Her goofy Christmas sweater did nothing but amplify her roundness, only topping it off with a few reindeer and jolly old fat man in a sleigh.

"You're not far from that," she announced quietly, her small voice echoing all around her. It bounced back and forth, going in both ears and twisting around in her brain before cementing itself deep in her subconscious. Hanna hesitantly lifted a hand, fingers tugging on the skin of her neck. Tears welled in her eyes as she thought about how much better her friends looked; no guy would ever give a second glance at Hefty Hanna.

Unlike Alison, where every guy was pining for her attention; her figure caught the attention of every teenage boy Hanna could only dream of getting close to. She didn't understand why she couldn't be like her - why she couldn't _be_ her. Everyone wanted attention from Alison; Hanna was doomed to a life of loneliness.

Three soft raps on the door yanked Hanna from her gloomy thoughts, hastily turning off the faucet while wiping at her eyes.

"It's occupied," she answered calmly, thankful her voice didn't crack.

"Hanna?" It was Emily.

"Em, I'm kind of in here. Can't you use another bathroom?"

"I don't have to go. I just..." Hanna heard Emily inhale deeply. "You've been gone a while. I wanted to make sure you were okay."

Hanna's heart fluttered at her friend's admission. '_Good ol' Em_.'

"I'm fine," she tried reassuring her, but her reply came out weaker than she intended, alerting the girl on the other side that Hanna wasn't, in fact, as okay as she wanted to be.

"I'm coming in." But before Hanna could protest, Emily had slipped inside, locking the door behind her.

They were silent, Hanna staring at the ground avoiding Emily's quizzical gaze. The brunette stepped forward, making Hanna take a giant step back. She didn't want to be touched. She felt gross.

"Han..."

"Emily, I want to be alone," Hanna tried to sound cold. She wouldn't allow Emily see her like this; she _couldn't_ allow it.

"I'm not leaving 'til you tell me." Emily held her ground, stepping forward until Hanna was backed against the wall, tilting the blonde's chin up so she could finally look in her eyes.

'_Broken_', was all Emily could think, taking in the deep sadness that seemed to flood Hanna's blue eyes. It filled her with anger; not towards Hanna, but at whatever was making her feel this way. Emily had always seen Hanna with a smile on her face, cracking one joke after the next, but had she really been so blind to her friend's apparent suffering?

Without saying a word, she pressed her lips to Hanna's forehead, both sets of eyes closing at the contact. It warmed Hanna's body to the point she almost forgot what she had been crying about.

Almost.

As soon as Emily pulled away, Hanna crumbled into her arms, and that's where the two stayed for the rest of the party.

* * *

Emily was always worrying about Hanna, even when they weren't speaking. She'd see her in the halls and two things would happen: her heart would tingle, and worry would set in. She had lost a lot of weight, and Emily worried she hadn't done it in a very safe way.

But, she couldn't really _ask_ the girl. They weren't on speaking terms, and it was rude to ask a question like that. Besides, it wasn't any of business, no matter how much she wanted it to be.

Hanna would see Emily in between classes, but she's never stop to say hi. They may be made eye contact twice a day, and each time her chest would ache. There was fear in Emily's eyes, but she couldn't quite pinpoint what it was aimed at. Was Emily afraid of her? What had she done to scare the girl? Why won't Emily just _talk_ to her?

It's not like Hanna could blame her; she hadn't once spoken to the swimmer since Ali's disappearance, and she decided it was for the best. She needed to keep her distance, anyway. The way Emily made her feel safe was not a feeling she was used to. Just the other girl's presence in a room could calm her down (once, in their English class, Hanna had to present her project, and her nerves were out of control; she took one look at Emily in the back of the room and she her anxiety disappeared).

But Emily knew her secret. Maybe that's why she stayed away. Hanna knew Emily wouldn't say anything, but that's because Hanna had promised her she would stop.

And she did, for a while.

But she was back doing it again, crouching over toilets and spending most of her lunch period alone in the restroom. She was scared of anyone catching her, so she used the girls' bathroom in the locker room; no one was ever in there during lunch.

So there she was, hunched over a toilet, the last bit of hacking sounds being drowned out by the unmistakable squeaking of the locker room door.

Her heart stopped. Maybe they hadn't heard. She hoped they hadn't heard. She _prayed_ they hadn't heard, and Hanna Marin is not one for praying.

"Hello?" The stranger called out.

_Shit_.

Hanna froze. She didn't dare move of breathe or god forbid, even _blink_. She didn't want anyone to know she was here. But the footsteps of the curious stranger drew closer, and she couldn't hide forever.

Each stall door made a sound as they were pushed open, tapping up against their metal walls and creaking shut again. When the footsteps stopped outside Hanna's stall, she heard the _thud_ of someone's hand as it made contact with the locked door.

"Hey, is someone in here?"

_Emily_?

"Yes," Hanna hoped the two girls had spent so much time apart that Emily wouldn't recognize her voice.

"Hanna? Is that you?"

_Crap_.

She sighed. "Yeah, it's me."

"What are you doing in the girls' locker room?" She could hear the smile Emily adorned. "I didn't think sports were your thing."

Hanna let out a breathy chuckle, but didn't say another word.

"What are you doing in here?" Emily broke the silence.

"Just... nothing."

"Hanna?" Emily sounded small. "Are you...?"

Her silence was all the answer Emily needed.

"Flush the toilet," Emily's voice was soft, yet demanding, but Hanna did as she was told, flushing the toilet and clambering to her feet.

"Unlock the door."

"Emily-"

"Hanna."

"No," she held her ground. "Go away."

"Don't tell me what to do," Emily sounded irritated.

"_What_?"Hanna gasped incredulously. "_You_ were just telling me what to do!" Hanna was having trouble containing her emotions, her eyes welling with tears as the volume of her voice rose along with her impending thoughts.

"That was-"

"Emily, go away. I don't want you to see me like this." Hanna managed to choke back a sob, but could do nothing to stop the tears from rolling down her cheeks.

They stood in silence, Emily's feet shuffling as she stepped away, followed by a tearing sound and running water before scampering back to her stall door.

"Open up, please. I want to help."

Hanna's heart thudded away in her chest, along with that family tightening she felt whenever she heard the brunette speak. '_She still cares_,' Hanna thought, hands shaking as she reached for the handle and twisted open.

The door opened slowly on its own, revealing a beyond worried-looking Emily standing with her wet hair cascading over her shoulder, duffle bag tossed carelessly to the tile floor beside her feet. She reached for Hanna's hand, pulling her forward and over to the sink, wiping away the remnants of Hanna's returned lunch from her lips.

Hanna's eyes fluttered shut at Emily's soft strokes, remembering the kiss Emily placed on her forehead when they were in a similar situation not long ago. She could still feel the heat of Emily's lips on her skin, silently wishing that she would do it again, just so she could feel something.

To her astonishment, Emily pulled her into a bear like hug, burying her nose into Hanna's hair. Hanna's hart pounded away in her chest, betting Emily could feel the effect she was having on her.

"I don't care that we haven't spoken in a year, I'm always here for you, Hanna. I want you to talk to me." Emily whispered. "I still love you."

Hanna finally released the sob she had been holding back ever since the other girl had found her minutes before. She clutched on to Emily, feeling like if she let go, her world would slither away.

"I still love you, too."

* * *

It was the day before graduation, and Hanna was spending the night at Emily's house. Her mind was reeling, thinking back to the party they had just come from, how they had stuffed their faces along with all of their friends while making jokes and having a good time.

Emily could sense there was something wrong with Hanna tonight; the girl was always looking in the direction of a bathroom, refusing to eat in front of a crowd of people. Emily would just stand by her side, reaching down to interlace their fingers, making sure Hanna knew she was stronger; she wasn't that person anymore.

And throughout the night, Hanna had to resist the urge to cry, for Emily was giving her all the strength she didn't have herself, just by the simple feeling if their hands clasped together.

Now they were in Emily's bed, Hanna rolling over to face Emily's back, watching her breathe in deeply and breathe out slowly.

She loved moments like this, when she could just watch Emily be Emily, even when the swimmer was just sleeping. It reminded Hanna how vulnerable the girl could be, even though she had been Hanna's anchor whenever she needed her to be.

It was harder for Hanna to think that, in a few short months, she and Emily would no longer be within walking distance of one another. They'd be in different states, and what if she wasn't strong enough? Emily wouldn't be there to keep her strong.

She knew it wasn't the other girl's job to do that, to keep her strong, but without Emily, Hanna didn't know if she could breathe.

Hanna scooted closer, arms wrapping around Emily's waist from behind, her toes coming just short of Emily's mid-calf as she buried her nose in dark hair, inhaling slowly. She moved closer until there was no more space between them, Emily's back pressed firmly to her front, holding back quiet whimpers as she thought about never being able to do this again.

She thought about how her feelings for the swimmer had scared her from the very beginning; from the moment she saw her to every time she talked to her from outside a bathroom door, and up to this very moment, where even though she knew she had nothing to be afraid of, the power that Emily held over her - the power to keep Hanna calm - was the most terrifying thing she had to experience.

"Emily, I don't know where to begin," she whispered into thick, dark hair, "You mean the world to me. I can't think about being so far away from you. I just want you to be with me, all the time. You're going to Penn State while I'm in New York... I don't like thinking about it. I'm going to miss everything about you: your smile, your hugs, the way you hold my hand when you sense that I'm scared, the way you make me laugh when no one else can, the way you kiss my forehead whenever I'm upset. And I'm definitely going to miss the way you make me feel like I'm the only person in the room by just looking at me, even when we're with Aria and Spencer. Emily Fields, you're my best friend. I can't even think about not having you in my life, even if it's only for short periods of time; even if we will see each other between semesters and over breaks - _that isn't enough for me_."

Hanna didn't know that Emily had woken up midway through her speech and was listening intently, waiting for Hanna to stop crying before she turned over to face her friend. She wanted to tell Hanna all of those things, too. She wanted Hanna to know how much she meant to her, what she _really_ meant to her.

"And..." Hanna croaked out, surprising Emily that she had more to say. "I want to tell you how glad I am that you came to the bathroom all those times, even when I pushed you away. Even when I yelled and screamed, you still stayed; you still stayed there and helped me. There aren't words to express how grateful I am for that - how grateful I am that you exist."

She couldn't take it anymore. Emily rolled over and gathered Hanna into an embrace, feeling cold toes press against her hot skin. Hanna's forehead was pressed against her own, their eyes locked while Emily traced patterns across her back, a lazy smile gracing her lips.

"I thought you were asleep."

"I was."

Hanna sighed before squeezing her eyes shut, her face twisting into an unreadable expression before it softened; a disbelieving laugh escaped her as she pulled the swimmer even closer.

"Damnit, Emily Fields, I think I've fallen in love with you."


	2. chapter 2

_Chapter Two: Maybe I'm Not as Cracked, but You're Still My Foundation_

* * *

It's early in the morning, or so Emily thinks, when she's woken by bright lights streaming in through the cracks of the curtains.

She's _exhausted_ - mentally, at least - from staying up talking to Hanna all night. After Hanna's confession, the two left nothing out, talking about everything from their fears of college to how quirky Aria looks whenever she wears the one feather earring and never the other.

But it's always been like this for them; they can delve into conversations about each other's deepest secrets, yet be smiling and joking like nothing had ever happened.

Being with Hanna is simple, for Emily, and she's always found it secure.

She feels something move down by her stomach, glancing down to find Hanna's hand gripping the material of her shirt like it was her life support. Emily only cranes her neck far enough to see Hanna's face, the unreadable expression she finds there beginning to unease her. She looks... scared? Maybe in pain? She can't really tell, but that doesn't stop her from sliding her fingers down Hanna's arm until they rest gently on her knuckle, wedging between the tiny gaps barely left by Hanna's. Almost instantly, the cotton falls loosely back in place, and the eerie look that was on Hanna's face is no more.

It makes Emily laugh, the position they're in: Hanna's almost a whole head shorter than she, but that certainly didn't stop her from taking on the role of the big spoon. Hanna's cold toes are nestled cozily between Emily's calves, nose grazing tan skin at the nape of her neck. Part of Emily wants so much to switch their positions, so be the one holding her, yet the other part of her was content with it; it was almost like Hanna was her shield, keeping away the demons Emily couldn't bear on her own.

She feels soft lips press delicately against her skin as Hanna stirs awake, quite quickly realizing their positions as she flings herself to the other side of the bed. Emily, more than confused, rolls on to her side, sees Hanna in a similar position, watching blonde hair fall from her ponytail piece-by-piece to the pillow behind her. She's not sure where she finds the courage, but she scoots over to Hanna, assuming the position Hanna had earlier on her, and rests her chin on Hanna's shoulder. She feels the blonde melt into her touch, only temporarily, before a sharp intake of breath has her body as stiff as a board.

"Well, good morning to you too," Emily's tone is soft, playful.

"I'm sorry," Hanna blurts, her body rigid, "f-for being close to you like that. I-I just thought, you know, after last night... actually, it wasn't even a thought, it was just a flash - barely even a millisecond! - where I was thinking of us being something different because we talked and so I guess I got the idea that spoo-"

Emily can't stand to see Hanna ramble (it's cute, but unnecessary) and pushes up on her elbow, grabbing Hanna's chin and twisting her head around just enough for Emily to kiss her silent.

* * *

The beach is hot; too hot for Emily, which is why she seated under their large umbrella, Aria and Spencer to her left, nursing a tall glass of ice tea as the three of them watch Hanna prance around in the sand. It's highly amusing, especially the parts where Hanna trips over people buried in the sand that she never sees coming.

Emily has a few magazines in her lap, shuffling through until she finds one mildly interesting, flipping it open only to discover it's one she's read hours before.

"It's getting late," Aria says brushing the dirt off her lap and leaning back on her towel. "I mean, we got here at noon, and now it's almost five."

"Someone get Hanna, I want to go home," Spencer huffs, standing up to shake the sand from her towel and fold it, tucking it into her beach bag. Aria and Emily follow suit, collecting all their things until Hanna's belongings are all that's left. By the time Emily is done pulling her sundress back on, Aria and Spencer are looking at her expectantly.

"What?"

"Well?" Spencer motions out towards the frantic blonde, who's only a few paces away from the ocean water. "Aren't you going to get her?"

"Why me?"

"She's _your_ girlfriend. Plus, Aria and I have to take all this crap back up to the house."

Before Emily can protest, Spencer and Aria and walking back up the pathway leading to Spencer's extravagant beach house, suddenly so thankful that the Hastings allowed the four of them to borrow it for a month.

She turns to look for her girlfriend, who is sitting right where the wet and dry sand meet, feet engulfed every time the dark water laps over them.

It makes her smile, but then again she feels the sinking feeling: the feeling of this not lasting forever; the feeling of separation; the feeling of fear that happens whenever she's not looking into baby blues.

She leaves her stuff and walks over to Hanna, taking a seat beside her, knees pulled tight against her chest while her chin rests on top. Emily glances over at her; Hanna seems to be deep in thought.

"We could buy a place like this, you know," Hanna says softly after they'd been sitting in silence for some time. "One day, after everything is over. After college, after my internship, when we can finally be with each other. It just seems so... far away."

"All I know is that, whatever happens, I'm super close to you right now."

She smiles, and Hanna smiles, and the anxiety about leaving each other in a few weeks is gone for a while.

* * *

Penn State isn't as bad as Emily thinks. Her roommate's cool, her workload isn't much (for now), and swimming doesn't start for another few weeks. She feels sort of in a state of limbo, but she knows that everything is about to start up, hard and fast, and she has to be ready.

She is ready. Well, at least she thinks she is.

It seems like the perfect opportunity to call Hanna: her roommate is out for the night, it's late enough that most students in the surrounding dorms are asleep; it's the most amount of privacy she'll have all week.

A few rings are all it takes and Hanna's voice fills her ears, her chest aching in many ways good and bad.

"Hello?" Hanna sounds groggy, very sleepy.

"Hi baby," Emily's voice is too cheery for this time of night - or morning, rather - and Hanna groans.

"Em, it's like one thirty. I have a morning class in seven hours. Why the hell are you calling me?"

Oh, how she'd missed cranky Hanna.

"I just... I miss you. And I wanted to hear your voice."

"You couldn't have waited to hear my voice for another few hours?" She hears Hanna sigh and a bit of ruffling over the line. Hanna mumbles a miniscule "hold on" and she hears more shuffling and a door close and more shuffling, until she hears Hanna speak again. "Sorry, I didn't want to wake the roomie."

"How is Sandra, anyway?" Emily teased.

"Ugh, _still_ throwing her dirty laundry any which way she pleases," she grumbled, making Emily chuckle. "You'll never guess what I saw when she dragged me window shopping with her today!"

"What?"

"A puppy, Em! A puppy! The cutest puppy I had ever seen. A stray, too. He just walked up to me and I fed him bits of my bagel when we stopped for coffee! God, I can't wait to move in with you so we can have our own puppy." Even through a twinge of sadness, Emily could feel her girlfriend's happiness radiating through her, even when they were miles apart. She laughed.

"What's so funny?" Hanna asked.

"Just... you." She smiled.

"What about me?"

"I just love you so much, you know?"

"Yeah, Em, I know." She could hear Hanna's smile, too.

"I miss you." This one was different than the first; this one was heavy and realistic. It felt like a chain, tugging at the hole in her heart where Hanna should be.

She hated this. She hated not being close to her best friend. She hated not being close to Aria or Spencer, even. Sure, everyone was a phone call of Skype call away, but it wasn't the same. Emily so desperately wanted to see the look of excitement on Hanna's face when she talked about the puppy, not just hear it through a botchy phone line.

"I miss you, and I'm so angry," Emily stated, closing her eyes to fight of the tears of frustration. "Everything sucks. I just want to be you with you. Do you know how hard it is to go to bed at night? I can't sleep when you're not next to me, Hanna. I just want you here, in my arms, where I know you're safe. Hanna..." her voice broke off, no longer to keep herself from crying.

"It hurts so much not being there with you right now," Hanna whispered as she listened to Emily cry. "But just a few more months, baby, and its holiday break. Can you make it a few more months? For me?"

"I can try."

* * *

She couldn't do it.

There was no way.

Every word looked like it formed its own sentence, like it wasn't even in English at all. They became so jumbled and confusing that Emily had thrown her book across the room in her frustration. She didn't bother meeting her roommate's questioning gaze as she stood up, shoved all her textbooks and pens and notes off her desk and stormed out of the room, slamming the door shut behind her and heading outside.

Finals were in a few weeks, and Emily was cracking. She was never good under stress, and she was beyond her limits at this point. She would spend nights awake studying and reviewing, only for it all to disappear when she decided to take a nap or swim a few laps.

And swimming was beginning to stress her out, too. Her times were slipping; Coach had to replace her as anchor for the past four meets.

She hadn't smiled in days.

Her everything was off, and she couldn't figure out how to fix it.

Now here she was, storming around the soccer fields on campus, threading her fingers through her messy, frizzy tresses that she couldn't bother pulling back into a bun or something, all while angrily huffing and puffing and stomping her feet. Suddenly, she froze, and let out the most alien scream of frustration that she had ever made, dropping to her knees afterwards to keel over in sobs.

She had never been so stressed out in her life, and it was slowly killing her.

Hanna. She needed Hanna.

But, the realization that her girlfriend was in New York and not five minutes away only added to her rage, and she punched the scruffy, muddy ground as hard as she could.

'_Stupid, stupid, stupid!_' she thought. '_How could you __**ever**_ _think you were smart enough to handle this? Worthless, pathetic, disgraceful. You weren't raised a failure, Emily Fields, but here you are now, the biggest failure of them all_.'

She felt vibrations coming from somewhere on her body, patting herself down until she fishes her cell phone from the pocket of her cardigan, Hanna's name lighting up her screen.

"What?" she answered harshly.

"What happened? Are you okay?" Hanna sounded worried.

"What are you talking about?"

"Marley called me. She said you threw all your stuff off your desk and stormed out of the room."

'_I should have never given my roommate Hanna's number_.'

"Yeah, yeah, Hanna, I'm fucking great!" she shouts. She didn't want to yell at Hanna - that was the last thing on her mind. Her girlfriend had just called at the worst possible time.

"Em, talk to me."

"I can't!"

"What do you mean "you can't"?" Hanna sounded more than confused.

"I'm a failure, Hanna! I can't do anything!"

"Emily Fields, what is this crazy talk? You are not a failure."

"I can't do it! I can't remember anything I'm supposed to know for finals; everything I study just basically falls out of my head the next second! I can't eat, I can't sleep, and I can't even swim! Nothing I do is right anymore, and I don't know how to fix it!"

They were both silent for a long while, the only sounds were Emily sniffles as silent tears rolled down her cheeks.

"Maybe it isn't your job to fix it," Hanna suggests, not sounding so sure of herself.

"What do you mean?"

"Nothing," she sounded determined. "Just... do you have plans for the weekend?"

"Hanna, _what_?"

"Do you?"

"No, but-"

"Good, Em, don't make any. Listen, I hate to do this, but I have to go. Tomorrow's Friday, right? I'll talk to you then." There was some muffled chatter as Hanna pulled the phone away from her mouth momentarily. "I love you Em, so much. Just hold on till tomorrow, okay? Trust me."

"...Okay."

* * *

She should have seen it coming; it was all too convenient, what with her roommate suddenly having a "family emergency" and leaving for the weekend, the room sparkly clean by the time she returned from class the next afternoon, but none of it made any sense until there was a knock at the door, and Emily came face to face with baby blues.

* * *

They were tangled together, naked underneath Emily's deep purple sheets, Hanna being the big spoon once more, tracing geometrical shapes on the small of her girlfriend's back.

"Who knew all I needed was some good sex to feel like myself again," Emily joked, basking in the afterglow of a long overdue, three-hour sex marathon that the two girls both desperately needed.

"Oh really, that's all?" Hanna smirked, turning to sit up, feet dangling off Emily's bed as she sat on the edge, toes just barely reaching the floor. She yawned, stretching out her arms as Emily sat behind her, pressing herself against Hanna's back and encircling Hanna's waist till there was no room left between them.

"Seriously, thank you," Emily brushed blonde hair aside to pepper kisses across a white, creamy neck. "God, I've missed you so much."

"I can't believe I flew out here to see you. I feel so spontaneous."

"You should," Emily purred, nipping softly at Hanna's shoulder.

"No, Em," she giggled, trying to squirm away but Emily kept her hold firm, tugging Hanna back down on to the bed and turning her so they were now face-to-face. Their laughter subsided and the two women were left in the silence of their happiness, Hanna tracing Emily's jawline as the brunette rested their foreheads together.

"Will you tell me what happened yesterday?" Hanna asked, her voice barely coming above a whisper.

Emily sighed, looking down briefly at their intertwined hands nestled between their chests and back up again.

"I... cracked."

Hanna remained silent.

"I cracked. I totally lost it. The amount of stress I was under, with finals coming up and the last swim meet next week, I felt like I couldn't handle it. Nothing seemed to be going right. I tried to do everything right but it all came out... wrong."

"Emily..."

"And I know that I'm not supposed to do everything right, but..." a small tear escaped, despite how much she tried to hold it back. "...I know shouldn't be doing everything wrong."

"Hey, listening to me," Hanna was demanding, yet gentle. "You got me right, okay? You got me so right, Emily. You've been under so much stress, and we both missed each other so much, it was starting to take a toll on us both."

Emily sniffled, nodding in agreement.

"And I want you to know that you are not a failure, because you know what you did? You made me see that for every Satan creature around like Alison DiLaurentis, there will always been one shiny knight who won't let the devil girl's bullshit taint or ruin any friendship that she made. You made me so much stronger than I could have made myself, Emily. I haven't made myself throw up in almost two years, and that's all because of you. So whenever you thing that you're a failure or that you can't do anything right, well I'm a living example here to prove you wrong."

Emily smile at this point was so bright; it could power the sun for at least a decade.

"I love you. I love you so damn much, Hanna."

"I love you, too."

"I've missed you. I finally feel like myself again."

"I know how you feel," Hanna smiled, pulling Emily close until they were flush against each other. "What do you say to pizza, ice cream and some horror movies? A good old girls night?"

"Can I choose this time?" Emily asked, her eyes hopeful as she smiled dopily up at her girlfriend.

"Ugh, fine, but wipe that cute ass grin off your face and put some clothes on. And you better not try to cop a feel during the movie, because if I feel any wandering hands if we watch something about zombies, I swear I will not hesitate to chop your fingers off."

* * *

**A/N: wow so i intended for this to but just a one shot but then i realized i had another idea and yay here we are. this picks up right where the other left off, and it's mostly don't from emily's pov. i'm not sure if i'll continue with this or try out something new, because i have a lot of hannily ideas floating around that don't quite go along with this story. let me know what you guys think.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: have i ever mentioned how inconsistent of a writer i am? wow, i'm so sorry guys, it's been forever since i promised this last chapter. i really am sorry. i hope this makes up for it! :)**

* * *

_(Final) Chapter Three: Adhesive_

* * *

She waited outside the terminal for what seemed like years. In the span of time since her arrival, she had already read through four magazines, downed a large cup of coffee, and even managed to write part of her graduate dissertation for physical therapy.

Now, Emily was pacing back and forth, clocking the minutes until Hanna would walk through the gates.

She was sure she looked maniac; her hair was jostled every which way from running her fingers through it, brown eyes wide and excited as she mumbled the numbers of the passing seconds under her breath.

"Flight 275 from Rochester International has now arrived," boomed a voice over the intercom.

Feeling her heart leap to her throat, Emily stood paralyzed as a crowd of people formed around her, all waiting to welcome back their loved ones or greet business partners. They shuffled about her, embracing and shaking hands while all Emily could do in her state of excitement was stare and wait even more.

Hanna plowed her way through the mob exiting through the gates with an expression of agitation. Her sunglasses were pushed to the top her head, tucking back her hair and giving Emily the relief of seeing her wonderful face after several months of separation.

When Hanna spotted her poised with a beaming smile, she sprinting across the distance and crushed Emily in an embrace. Hanna's arms tightened around her neck, eyelids falling shut at the feeling of Emily's hands on her lower back.

"You're here," Emily whisper, a grin threatening to split her cheeks in two. Hanna nodded in response, nuzzling the warm skin of Emily's neck.

They parted a minute later only for Emily to capture her lips, moving to kiss the dimples on both her cheeks when Hanna pulled away to laugh. She bumped their foreheads together, wiggling forward just enough to tap Hanna's nose with her own. Emily's hands had since migrated to the blonde's hips, thumbs pushing under the hem of her sweater to brush along her skin. Hanna let a whimper of pleasure escape at being able to taste the other girl on her lips, tracing a subconscious line between Emily's melting eyes smiling mouth.

"Shall we go grab your things?" Emily pondered, hugging Hanna even closer.

"As much as I don't feel like moving," she huffed, not bothering to finish her current sentence. "I just wish I had a lackey or something to go get it for me."

Emily laughed. "That's what I'm here for." Hanna shook her head and nudged Emily playfully on the shoulder, watching as the swimmer took a step back to faux-bow and sweep her arm out to the side. "After you, milady."

* * *

The crisp chill of spring air was shielded from her by a strong, warm presence wrapped around her waist. Emily's skin was scalding against her back and while she was thoroughly enjoying the feeling, she cursed the laws of nature that felt compelled to ruin her bliss by having her need to use the restroom.

Prying Emily's arms off without waking her proved to be a strenuous task; the swimmer would not her let go. After a bit of coaxing, Emily's tan arms loosened their grip just enough for Hanna to shimmy out from between them and roll out of bed. She picked up Emily's oversized flannel shirt they discarded from the floor and tugged it over her shoulders, clasping three of the buttons to keep out the cold. From behind her, Emily mumbled something in her sleep and she turned to see her girlfriend clutching the pillow that Hanna had used the night before to her chest. An adorable pout adorned her lips and Hanna was reluctant to leave, but the pressure on her bladder quickly reminded her of why she had gotten up in the first place, forcing her to leave the room and Emily's completely exposed nude body behind her.

Heading straight to the kitchen from the bathroom, Hanna decided to test her abilities at making coffee, since Emily was usually the one to make it for them. The instructions on the package were fuzzy and she sighed in realization that she had left her reading glasses on the night stand. As she turned around to march back into the bedroom, Emily stood leaning on the doorframe, twirling Hanna's glasses between her fingers.

"I think you forgot something," Emily smirked as Hanna gulped audibly.

"I was just about to go get those," Hanna stated, eyes boring into Emily's as she tried not to gawk at her naked breasts, stepping forward to retrieve her glasses. "Thanks, Em."

"That's not what I meant," Emily chuckled as the innuendo seemed to go over Hanna's head. "But you're welcome." She took a moment to study Hanna's outfit and let out a small moan of appreciation. "I've missed seeing you in my clothes."

Hanna, choosing to feign aloof, positioned her glasses on her face and whirled around to finish the task at hand. "Aren't you cold?"

"I don't know." Emily padded forward, coming to a stop behind her. "You tell me," she husked into her ear, placing her hands on the counter on either side of Hanna's body, and pressed herself flush against Hanna's back.

The spoon clattered against the counter top, falling from Hanna's hands as she felt Emily's hot breath on her neck, one of the swimmer's hands moving to slip under the fabric of her Hanna's shirt and lie against her stomach. She stretched her palm out and moved it slowly in a circle as Hanna struggled to control her breathing. Emily's hand meandered its way to Hanna's sternum, rising and falling with the rapid motions of her girlfriends expanding chest.

"You feel pretty warm to me," Hanna whispered, eyelids slamming shut as Emily reached up to palm her breast, head falling back to rest on a tan shoulder. Emily seized the opportunity and latched on to Hanna's throat just below the corner of her jaw, nipping at her pale flesh. Soothing over the bites with her tongue, she continued her little attacks until she physically couldn't reach anymore skin. Having lost her patience, Hanna spun around and crashed their lips together in a searing kiss.

She trailed her tongue along Emily's lip until her girlfriend gasped, giving her just enough room to slip it inside. Pulling away, Hanna snagged Emily's bottom lip between her teeth, tugging it along with her. Emily growled playfully and pulled her back in, snaking her hands down to Hanna's thighs and hoisting her up on to the counter, knocking over the coffee pot in her haste. Hanna tried leaning back to say something but Emily pushed forward, not giving a damn about anything else at this point. She parted Hanna's legs a bit wider, just enough to step between them and bring their centers dangerously close to one another's.

"Em," Hanna moaned, feeling Emily tease her fingers across the growing heat at the apex of her thighs.

"Don't worry, baby girl," she breathed, "I'm coming."

* * *

Spencer and Aria had taken her out for lunch that day, since Emily had been bogged down with school. She was disappointed, but proud of her girlfriend for managing to pull through and move on to grad school. When Emily had her breakdown back when she was a student at Penn State, Hanna wasn't sure if she could even make it through her sophomore year. Emily managed to surprise them all and graduated with high honors, and Hanna had been filled with so much admiration for her girlfriend it was leaking through every hug and smile she would direct her way.

Aria was chatting on about something she wasn't really paying attention to as her mind flitted back to Emily and their earlier activities this morning. Spencer regained her attention by flicking a cherry tomato at her forehead.

"What are you, seven?" Hanna grumbled while the two girls snickered at her annoyance.

"We've been trying to get you to listen for like five minutes Han, but you've been staring off into space with lovey-dovey moon eyes," Aria managed to quip through her laughter.

"I have not!"

"Have so," Spencer smiled, thoroughly amused with their antics. "Maybe someone had a good morning?" She mused, wiggling her eyebrows.

Hanna smirked. Three can play at this game.

"I made Emily coffee this morning."

"And?" Aria trailed off, prompting the girl for an answer.

Her saucy remark was cut short by a tugging on her sleeve. She glanced down to see a little girl beaming up at her. Her eyes flickered back to Spencer and Aria, who only shrugged.

"Hi," Hanna said with curiosity as she smiled down to the little girl, whom was practically bouncing with excitement.

"Are you Hanna Marin?" She asked, grin growing toothier by the second.

"Um, yes?" Hanna answered, completely befuddled at why a child would know who she was.

"I was looking through one of my sister magazines and saw the pretty pictures you took of those models and their nice clothes, so I read your interview in the back, and I just wanted to tell you that I really liked those photos! A lot!"

Hanna felt her heart turn to mush. "Thank you so much, sweetie!"

"I like to take pictures, too!" The little girl exclaimed. "But they're not of people. I take pictures of Henry," she held up the raggedy stuffed bunny tucked beneath her left arm.

Hanna chuckled warmly. "You know, when I was younger and before I took those pictures for that magazine, I used to make my friends dress up and model for me. Those two, right over there," she pointed to Spencer and Aria, who waved at the little girl with matching smiles, "and one of my other friends, but she's not here right now."

"Really?" The little girl looked hopeful and Hanna nodded in response.

"Yep. All the time!"

"I wanna be a photographer when I grow up, too!" Someone called out for the little girl and she looked away and smiled at woman walking towards the exit. "That's my mom, but thank you for talking to me!"

"No, thank you, sweetie!" Hanna smiled. "And keep taking pictures of Henry; I'm sure he'll appreciate it when he gets older, too."

The girl giggled. "Bye, Hanna!" She waved, and Hanna watched her turn and leave with a smile on her face.

"Oh God, someone call an ambulance because I think my heart just melted," Aria stated, placing a hand over her chest. "That was sickeningly cute."

"What can I say," Hanna tried to play nonchalant, but she was certain her heart was twisting in the same way as Aria's, "children love me."

"Finally over you fear?" Spencer asked, taking a large sip of her water.

"Working with Sean's mom all those years ago really helped," Hanna stated with a wave. "Plus, they had me photograph a few kids back in New York, and they weren't too bad."

"So do you think you and Emily will…" Aria trailed off, noticing Hanna stiffen at the suggestion. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Hanna turned to look at the wall beside them.

"I'm sorry, did I cross a line?"

"No, it's just," Hanna sighed, resting her head in one hand and looking back towards her friends. "Emily and I haven't even talked about it much. I mean, sure, we kid around and says silly things like "you shouldn't be so careless with leaving your underwear around the house; imagine if our kids found it lying around somewhere", but nothing serious."

"Okay first," Spencer piped up, "Ew. Second, do you even want to have kids?"

"I guess. I just never pictured myself as someone who gets married and has children, but, since I've been with Emily… it's different."

"Different?" Aria raised an eyebrow. "Different how?"

"It's just… different," she shrugged. "Because now, I can see myself being with this one person for the rest of my life. And, please don't make fun of me for this, but this morning, when I woke up and saw her sleeping, it truly crossed my mind. Like, "damn, I could marry this girl"."

Spencer and Aria made similar cooing sounds as Hanna's cheeks reddened in embarrassment.

"Stop it, guys."

"You're too easily flustered for your own good, Han," Spencer chuckled. "You should probably talk to Emily about this."

"Yeah, I think you're right."

"In the meantime," Aria grinned, "Can we talk about how down right adorable your guys' kids would look? I mean, a little Hanna running around with tan skin or even a black haired, brown eyed little boy with your freckles and, oh God, someone stop me before I fall privy to a cuteness coma."

* * *

A few weeks later, Hanna was sitting at the kitchen counter, flicking through her photographs trying to decide which ones to include in her portfolio when she heard Emily's keys fiddling with the lock on the door.

"Han?"

"In the kitchen!"

She heard an excited giggle and a strange yipping sound come from behind her. Confused, Hanna spun around on the barstool and watched with wide eyes as her girlfriend stood in front of her, a blinding smile on her face and arms behind her back that seemed to be squirming around without her knowledge.

"Em, what-"

"Before you say anything, let me talk," Emily insisted like it was the most important thing in the world, the grin never leaving her face. "So, I was thinking about what we talked about last week, y'know, kids and stuff, and I remembered something you said to me back when we first started college and when I saw this little guy on the way home today," she moved her hands from behind her back and presented to Hanna a small black puppy, one ear floppy and the other standing straight up, tongue hanging excitedly from his mouth, "I couldn't resist."

"Oh my god!" Hanna scooped the puppy into her arms and he licked happily at her chin. "Emily, he's so cute!"

"I know, right?" Emily's heart clenched as she watched her girlfriend nuzzle their new friend's forehead with her nose. "I figured pets are kind of like kids, and if we have a dog and get a feel for what it's like, maybe in a few years when I'm done with grad school and we both have solid careers, we can maybe explore the option of possible extending our family?" She ended in an anxious tone, voice shaky and cheeks crimson as Hanna stared back at her in astonishment. "I mean, that is if you still want to have kids with me and aren't totally annoyed by my crankiness and such."

Without saying anything, Hanna stood up and pulled Emily to her, being careful not to squish their new puppy between them as she kissed her hard. It was chaste, but Emily felt reassured by it, nonetheless. It was cut short as their antsy little friend wiggled in Hanna's arms, craning his neck to lick both of their chins in one fell swoop.

They chuckled into the kiss and as they pulled away, the puppy continued licking Hanna's jaw until he squirmed from her arms and leapt to the floor, taking off running and yipping happily through their apartment. Hanna laughed as she watched her girlfriend scamper after him, very pleased with the image of Emily chasing a little baby boy or girl in their diaper one day.

* * *

Emily walked into their home after a grueling day of work to a house that was pleasantly silent. Normally, Pluto would be waiting for her at the door with his tongue hanging out, ready to pounce on her and beg her to take him for a walk on the beach. This time, Emily was by herself she walked around the lower level of their house, wondering why it was so quiet.

"Pluto?" She called out. "Marceline? Hanna? Hellooo, anyone home?" After checking every room and finding no sign of her family anywhere, she pulled of her boots and made her way upstairs. A soft snore caught her attention and she followed after it, stopping outside her bedroom door and leaning against the doorframe.

In her bed was her wife, daughter and dog, Marceline curled into Hanna's chest with Pluto sprawled out by their feet. Emily's heart warmed as she took a step forward, burning the image of her usually noisy family so at peace into her mind. She sat down on the side table and reached over to tuck a few loose strands of Hanna's long blonde hair behind her ear that seemed to have fallen out from her bun. Against her hand, Hanna began to stir.

"Em?" she whispered, her voice full of sleep as she craned her neck around so she could look at her wife. Emily placed a finger against her smile and bent down to place her lips on Hanna's forehead, inhaling the familiar scent of her strawberry shampoo.

"Go back to sleep," she murmured, fingers stroking through Hanna's hair.

"We left a mess in the kitchen when Marci and I tried to make you pizza. I need to clean it up."

Emily chuckled softly. "Don't worry about it. I'll clean it up. I'll be back up in a little bit, because a power nap sounds really nice right now. We can just order some Thai food when we wake up."

"Okay," Hanna smiled lazily, blue eyes twinkling with remnants of sleep. Their daughter stirred against Hanna's chest for a moment, twisting so more of her thick blonde hair fell onto her face. The two women laughed and Hanna reached out to brush her daughter's bangs back from her forehead.

"I'll be right back, I promise," Emily squeezed Hanna's shoulder and moved to stand up, but Hanna grabbed her by the lapel of her jacket and managed to steal a few small kisses before she let her go.

"Happy birthday, Emily," Hanna smiled before she rolled back over and closed her eyes. Emily stood pondering, considering her options before deciding to just leave the mess in the kitchen and shed her blazer, walking over to the other side of the bed and snuggled up behind her daughter, reaching out to place her hand on top of Hanna's.

The little girl beneath their arms groaned sleepily before rolling over to bury her nose against Emily's collarbone. Hanna's eyes opened as she watched their daughter curl into a ball and cuddle closer to her wife, who was doing the same.

"Hi mommy," Marceline squeaked out.

"Hi angel."

"Happy birthday," she mumbled before falling back asleep. Emily looked up and locked eyes with Hanna, who was smiling softly at her. Emily kissed her daughters head and trailed her fingers up Hanna's arm until her palm was cupping her soft cheek.

"Yeah, it is pretty happy," Emily stated before letting her eyes fall shut, anticipating the moment when they'd wake up still huddled together like this.


End file.
